(CONTINUED FROM PREVIOUS MESSAGE)

While ham radio is a hobby, some of us joke as if it is an obsession!! So,
with credit and glory to The Lord Jesus Christ for the inspiration; and
with extensive research in the "creative juices department", I've figured
out what a "ham radio wedding"...plus a "ham radio honeymoon", and "Ham
For The Holidays" might be like. Please note that these are "fun skits",
done "tongue in cheek", as it were; because the skits are NOT actual
weddings, honeymoons, or holiday events; although the "Ham For The
Holidays" segment comes close.

This is because in real life, a bona fide wedding requires an Ordained Minister, Justice Of The Peace, etc. to officiate the ceremony...and,
the couple has to have a marriage license, among other things. I know
that myself, having been originally married in 2003, but I've been a
widower since 2007.

As an aside, when my bride to be and I went to get our marriage license,
the county clerk made a mistake, entering her birth year as 1658, instead
of 1958. I quipped "she sure looks good for 345 years of age", and she
added "Well, I do sell Avon"!! She was studying for the Technician Class license at the time of her passing, 3 weeks shy of our 4th anniversary.

Amidst the raucous laughter...the blushing, embarrassed clerk had to
tear up the license she was typing, and start over. People in the
Pulaski County Courthouse in downtown Little Rock, Arkansas...including
both city, county, and state law enforcement officers, had to enter the
County Clerks office to ask "what is going on in there??", for all the laughter!! The embarrassed clerk lamented "You don't want to know!!",
which brought another round of raucous laughter (hi hi).

While there is a "ham radio license" noted in the skit, it's rather
bizarre to consider the context that someone would actually marry a
piece of electronic equipment!! Besides, think of all the issues
surrounding "consummation of the relationship"...and that will be
covered in "The Honeymoon And More" (hi hi).

As noted, the humor has quite a bit of ham radio puns, also known as
"a play on words"...and the beauty of the pun is in the groan of the recipient!! An example of a pun is that "The idea of a ham radio traders
net might have gotten started when a pig was sold by a farmer to a
Country Pawn Shop, and the transaction became known as the first
Ham Hock". (Please don't throw the tomatoes at me...I'd rather have
them in a salad...as H.A.M. stands for "Have Another Meal", and you
don't call us "late for dinner" (hi hi)).

These skits were designed for a little levity, and a little bit of fun...
as there is so little in the world to laugh at nowadays. There are
several in central Arkansas, including yours truly, who fondly remember
the "fertilizer nets", done by the late J.M. Jolly, W5ZXS (SK)...and I
think he would've done something like this on that net.

And now, the Cabot Nightflyers Net is proud to present tonight's training presentations...starting with "The Ham Radio Wedding"...enjoy.

**

The Ham Radio Wedding - Uniting Ham And Radio In Holy Telephony

With "pun" in mind, we are privileged to welcome you to the marriage
ceremony of "ham" and "radio". After a short engagement...because
concerning Radio, Ham could not resistor...wanting to inductor into
being a part of his family, and start a new one. So, they've decided to
do more than just "shack up".

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today for this special net for the
joyous occasion to join ham and radio in Holy Telephony. Ham has just
passed his amateur radio license exams, so he will be Third Party Traffic,
as he waits on his callsign from the FCC.

The general format of this RF, or Real Fine, ceremony, is participatory
in nature...and for the bride and groom, it is a big deal...and the
atmosphere is rather electric, to say the least.

If anyone here feels that ham and radio should not be united in Marriage
of Holy Telephony, let them key up now, or never pound their brass.

However, you likely will be subjected to the wrath of the Wouff Hong, Rettysnitch, and Ugerumph by both families if you object (hi hi).

Does the father of the bride, KenWood, give his consent for this special occasion??

[Sound of "YES, I do", 20 wpm CW]

Do you ham, take radio, to be your lawfully wedded spouse?? To love, honor,
and cherish?? In DXCC and WAS?? In QRM and QRN?? With Rohn 25 and G5RV??
With coaxial cable and various connectors?? With logbooks and manuals??
With Solder and Testing Equipment??

Respecting The Wouff Hong, Rettysnitch, and Ugerumph, Your License, and Privileges. Forsaking all others, as long as you both shall transmit and receive, during your relationship, until Silent Key, do you part??

[Sound of male voice "QSL. I Certainly Do."(Tim Cornett)]

Do you radio, take ham, to be your lawfully wedded spouse?? To love, honor,
and cherish?? In DXCC and WAS?? In QRM and QRN?? With Rohn 25 and G5RV??
With coaxial cable and various connectors?? With logbooks and manuals??
With Solder and Testing Equipment??

Respecting The Wouff Hong, Rettysnitch, and Ugerumph, Your License, and Privileges. Forsaking all others, as long as you both shall transmit and receive, during your relationship, until Silent Key, do you part??

[Sound of PSK31]

(CONTINUED NEXT MESSAGE)
--- SBBSecho 3.20-Win32
* Origin: The Thunderbolt BBS - Little Rock, Arkansas (618:250/33)